Tuesday, August 29, 2006


Well, okay, I'm going to start this off by saying that there is no chance that the movie "The Gaurdian" starring Kevin Costner and Ashton Kutcher is going to be good. The movie is about about two Coast Guard swimmers who rescue fishermen and boaters from dangerous ocean waters.

First of all, it stars Kevin Costner and Ashton Kutcher. Kevin Costner is the most boring actor in the world. He has only one emotion....I think he only smiles once during each movie, and I think it might just be because he's gassy.... Has this guy even been marketable since "Field of Dreams"?

Oh man, and Ashton Kutcher. I'll just give you a quote from a press conference today, where Mr. Kutcher addressed many "Coasties" to promote the movie: "When I first read the script, I thought it was all made up because I didn't think anyone got to be that cool."

Speaking of great acting, Kevin Federline will be appearing as a "menacing, arrogant teen who harasses investigators" in an episode of CSI that is tentatively set to air in October. Why does this man get a part on the most watched show on television!!!! I hope he gets to quote his song "America's Most Hated":

"But its okay, i got somethin for ya
I'm handin' out ass kickins' like diplomas
Who the first to get it?
Ya' know K Feds wit it, All that shit rappers talk about, I already did it.
I'm committed - to the game, The fames why I hustle
Lyrical exercise, workin' every muscle on the double
Chief and commanda
Hand ya ass to ya in a basket wrapped in plastic
I'm looney, All these model chicks wanna do me."

One movie I am looking forward to seeing is Jackass 2, coming out on September 22, 2006. Allegedly, Johnny Knoxville is even crazier in the second movie.

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